Monday, August 10, 2009

Shower Updates

As ever mother knows, as soon as your children can walk and talk, shower time is no longer sacred. Also, it has to be all business. There's no soaking or opening up of the pores. It's straight in, shampoo, conditioner, body wash (if you're lucky- sometimes, my sister pointed this out to me, I just use the shampoo as I'm rinsing it out to wash the rest of me) and you're done.

Lillian likes to come give me updates on the general goings-on of the house. Here's today's updates:

  1. Mom, Nora's awake. (I only put her down 30 minutes ago) Did you help her wake up? No, she did it on her own. (I don't believe that for one minute)
  2. Mom, Nora's crying.
  3. Mom, Nora has poop. In her diaper? No, in her crib. (Great)
  4. Mom, I had an accident. Well, it was just a little accident (accigent, as she says). Did you make a mess? No, I put my panties in the toilet. That's nice.
This all in about 15 minutes.

Yesterday, I was thinking about how people my age are starting to get divorced and how sad that is. (Seriously, a couple we were in the singles' ward with who got married literally the day before me and Tyler got divorced.)

Me: Let's never get divorced, OK? We'll just stay married forever. I mean, I want our kids to have it normal.

Tyler: OK, but I think "normal" is to have divorced parents.

Me: OK, then. I want our kids to have it bizarre.

Tyler: With you as their mother, they'll have no choice.

Do you see what I have to put up with? And, with mornings like this one, how could any person stay sane?

The reason I had to take a shower is because I did day 7 of the 30-Day Shred. We went to The Wal-Mart to buy hand weights because I have heretofore been using cans of green beans. In the hand weight aisle, while Tyler and Lillian tried out the family pack of boxing gloves (what a brilliant idea) I tried out all the moves of the Shred with the 3 lb weights, and then the 5 lb weights. The 3 pounders were pretty easy, and I could tell that I wouldn't be able to do the whole thing with 5 lbs. Tyler convinced me to get the weights I wish I could do, instead of what I knew I could do easily.

Turns out: no. I can't do the whole thing with 5 lbs. And, I can no longer pick up Nora. Sorry kid.


Emily said...

OH, you are so deep in it Amanda. You are must so "in it" right now. Good luck, you're doing great, your kids are and will be fantastic. And I got to the 2nd level of 30 day shred and quit for all my vacations. I was planning on starting again, but now I remember how awful it is. Good luck.

Jenna said...

Um...I don't think you and Tyler got divorced. :-) Else I am totally missing something.

Jenna said...

Ooops...never mind. I read that wrong. :-P

krissiecook said...

If you're having to choose between shampoo and body wash, the solution is simple: shave your head. Then you won't need shampoo, and the body wash will help give your scalp that fruity zing it's been jealously smelling all over your body.

Natchel said...

HAHAHAHA ohhh this post gave me so much pleasure!
And I want to know more about this 30 day shred! tell me about it!

Carrie said...

My sister Beth's shower is a 'walk-in', meaning there is no door. The comfort of knowing that someone is watching your kids while you shower is offset by the fact that all 4 of her kids will come in to visit you, including the ones that can only crawl.
Lillian is very helpful, to keep you so well informed.

Myriah said...

I started The Shred with Five Pounders, so I never knew anything else. I can't imagine moving on to level two, but at least I can make it through level one with the Fivers. Kinda.

Do you think it still counts as Shredding if I never move on to level two or three?

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